If you’ve been paying attention for the past few years and if you’re watching this show, we hope you are, there has likely been a moment when you realized that reality is not quite what you thought it was. A lot of the things you assumed were true, in fact, are not true. They are instead a mirage. They’re a web of purpose-built myths designed to deceive rather than inform you. You can’t really trust your senses anymore. Your eyes will lie to you.
That’s an unnerving thought, especially when you realize that ultimately Vladimir Putin is behind at all. Russian disinformation is everywhere in this country. It’s lurking even within our own minds. It’s worse even than Adam Schiff told us. It was just last weekend, for example, thousands of Southwest Airlines flights failed to leave the ground. It seemed obvious that the mass cancelations were a direct reaction to Joe Biden’s vaccine mandates. They were announced just days before, and then actual Southwest pilots appeared to confirm this. But no, that’s just what the Kremlin wants you to think. In fact, as the authorities assured us all along, it was only the weather. Nothing more than a few clouds calm down America. That Southwest Airlines story is as fake as Hunter Biden’s laptop.
Don’t the Russians lie to you? People love the vaccine mandates, even the thousands who’ve been fired because of them. They know perfectly well how naughty they’ve been. They need discipline, and they’re grateful to get it. Thank you, Mr. President. May I have another?
There is a reason. In other words, that Joe Biden is the single most popular head of state in American history. And the reason is he’s awesome. How beloved is Joe Biden? Well, let’s put it this way at sporting events across the country, fans are breaking out in cheers for the White House and its wise and eloquent leader. These are not coordinated political set pieces astroturf, as we say in Washington. No. These are spontaneous eruptions of love. One minute you’ll be watching a college football game from the stands. The next minute you’ll be overcome with the desire, the pressing, irresistible need to tell Joe Biden how great he is. It’s like having to go to the bathroom real bad, except better and more progressive. This is happening, ladies and gentlemen, and it’s happening everywhere. A cresting tsunami of support for Joe Biden.
Chants of “F*** Joe Biden” at football games in Utah, Oklahoma, Mississippi and New Jersey
It’s inspiring when you think about it. Joe Biden, on his first day in office, promised to bring this country together, and now he’s actually doing it. It doesn’t matter what team you showed up to root for in your heart, you are a Joe Biden fan. And that is national unity. Now, not everyone is for this, of course. To Vladimir Putin, who hates us for our freedoms, but also because he’s Russian. This is a threat loving Biden is a thing of beauty. So by definition, Vladimir Putin must destroy it. It’s like a sunset, a rose garden, a baby smile. It’s something lovely that must be defiled if Russia is going to dominate the world.
So in order to corrupt what is good and beautiful, Putin has spread the lie that these expressions of pure devotion to Joe Biden are instead attacks on Joe Biden. Vulgar attacks that include an epithet beginning with F. And sadly, a lot of people believe that Russian disinformation is effective. That’s why they do it.
So thank heaven NBC has been there to correct that misperception. Over the past several years, NBC has done maybe more than any other news organization in this country to fight the Kremlin’s propaganda machine. Thanks to NBC, for example, your doubts about the fairness of the last election have not only been settled, they’re now illegal. You’re not allowed to express them ever again. So we can be thankful that there was a credentialed representative of NBC Sports on hand earlier this month when fans at a NASCAR event began to celebrate spontaneously celebrate Joe Biden. If the NBC lady had not been there, you might very well have misheard what the crowd said.
Driver Brandon Brown: Oh, my God. Just such an unbelievable moment. // Reporter: Brandon, you also told me I can hear the chants from the crowd. Let’s go, Brandon.
F Joe Biden, please come on, wake up, America. That’s like looking at the thriving, incredibly robust economy all around us and concluding there’s inflation. Settle down, Vladimir Putin, that’s ridiculous.
What they said and you could hear it very clearly if you just open your ears to the truth is, let’s go, Brandon. The NBC lady made that very clear. Not f Joe Biden. Let’s go, Brandon.
But who is Brandon, you ask? Well, just another happy American who is grateful for the wise leadership of his benevolent president. In fact, Brandon is a newly arrived American part of what we call the Biden generation. He’s an undocumented trans Haitian migrant now enrolled thanks to a Pell Grant as a film studies major at NYU, as well as a part-time non-binary rights activist and puppeteer. Brandon is the embodiment of the new American dream, where everything’s free, but everyone is still angry.
Just this month, thanks to Joe Biden. Brandon got his fourth COVID shot. That means he’s an incredibly good person, far better than you are. And the crowd is simply celebrating that as grateful people spontaneously do. Let’s go, Brandon. Let’s get a fifth shot. Let’s go, Brandon.
So once you strip away the Russian propaganda, it’s all pretty obvious and natural. But it does make you wonder if you pause for a moment. If the Russians are lying about Brandon, what else are they lying about? And we’re glad you asked. They’re lying about hospitals.
Vladimir Putin is making up stories about our hospitals here in the United States. Putin claims that our health care system is collapsing because of Joe Biden’s vaccine mandates, and that’s preposterous. And yet somehow, those crafty and relentless Kremlin propagandists have managed to get that story onto American television.
News Report from Lowville, NY in September: Reporter: Hospital officials say they still plan to pause service in the maternity unit starting Saturday. // Hospital official: You know, we’ve had 43 resignations. Seventy percent of those are in clinical areas and unfortunately a number of the maternity nurses, you know, the professionals who do labor delivery and postpartum care are part of that group.
So the maternity nurses all left, there’ll be no more delivering babies in that hospital. Now the Russians blame Joe Biden for this. But the truth is very different. The truth is that this is yet another heartfelt tribute to Joe Biden. Those nurses left so they can devote more time to campaigning for Joe Biden’s reelection in 2024. Once again, this is an act of love disguised by a foreign power as an act of contempt. That’s happening in a lot of places, Ladies and gentlemen, not just New York.
Central Maine Medical Center is one of the biggest hospitals in the state of Maine. It just halted its pediatric and trauma admissions. Want to treat your child for disease? You’ve been hurt in a car accident. You can’t go there. Why? Well, they cited staffing shortages because of the vaccine mandates. According to one local news outlet, “The hospital is preparing to potentially lose hundreds of workers. So far, 84 staff members have resigned.” This is one hospital in a smallish town in one state. And they’re going to quote lose hundreds of workers.
Well, that’s one way to look at it. That’s the Russian way to look at it. The patriotic way to look at it—the Joe Biden approved way to look at it is very different. Here it is. It means hundreds of new job openings for the foreign nationals currently streaming over our southern border. There will be no unemployment crisis for them. So in fact, this is a massive win. Thanks to the vaccine mandate, these illegal Americans will have plenty to do, not just in Maine but everywhere.
In Washington state, the Spokane Spokesman Review just reported that “Long-term care facilities could face critical staffing shortages.” Why? Vaccine mandates taking effect October 18th? Oh, so if you just showed up from another country without permission to be here, you know what you can do for a living. Take the place of someone who moved on—legacy Americans
In the state of Michigan, the head of the largest nursing homes association said the vaccine mandates will cause them to “face an even greater crisis.” Or as a good American would put it, a greater opportunity.
Residents of Seattle, by the way, are about to have plenty of new opportunities, opportunities to practice their self-defense skills. It’s a good excuse to brush up on that Taekwondo from fifth grade, bet you forgot about those skills. Time to get them back. The people of Seattle are about to confront a massive shortage of law enforcement officers. Why? You guessed it. Joe Biden’s vaccine mandates. Here’s how one local news station reported it.
Seattle News Report: Already short-staffed, the Seattle Police Department is preparing for a potential mass firing of officers starting October 13. The agency will move into what’s called a stage three mobilization, what the department’s manual says is reserved for scenarios that have the potential to cause significant harm, property destruction or widespread public fear. // 354 sworn personnel had not submitted proof of vaccination as of Tuesday. That number dropped to 292 today, but still, that’s more than 25 percent of all deployable officers.
So we’ve just given you a snapshot of what’s happening in the country, but it’s happening all around the country, from coast to coast and all through the middle of the country. And it’s happening right now. And that means in the coming months, at some point you’re going to call 9-1-1 for an emergency or you’re going to show up at the hospital with an injury, or you’re going to try to catch an airplane flight and you will notice that you can’t because the hospitals, the police departments, the fire departments, your airlines, none of them work anymore.
Now Joe Biden is going to take the blame for this if the Russians have their way. Vladimir Putin will tell you it’s Joe Biden’s fault. Oh no, no, it’s a tribute to Brandon. Let’s go, Brandon.